Gender Inequality

Having lived in Ethiopia for roughly 9 months now, I have never been more aware of the gender inequalities that women in developing countries face. This has also made me much more aware of the gender inequalities that continue to exist in America. Even though I face challenges to being a woman in Ethiopia, I am better off than most of the women here. I am a foreigner and that has its benefits. At the end of my service I get to leave Ethiopia. The rest of these women are here for life.

If there’s a day that I don’t receive any harassment, I still witness what life is like for Ethiopian women on a daily basis. Ethiopian women that I go to when I have questions or I need help with something in my house, women that I find to be so strong, I feel them change when they are around men. Around men, women are usually very quiet. They are there to serve them meals and make them coffee. I saw a teenage boy preparing tea once after a meal to help his mom. The man that was at the table told me that he was a female because he was making tea. “That’s a woman’s job,” he said. I see it also in my English club. The girls are always very quiet and shy. Rarely do they speak up. I have to tell them several times to speak loudly so I can hear them. I have one student who lives across the street from me who asks me all the time when the next English club is. I tell her the day and time but she never shows up. Whenever I see her I always ask her why she wasn’t present. She tells me that since her mom gets everything prepared for the market the following day, she has to stay home and do all the work around the house. I can’t get mad at her for that. Each time she apologizes and I just tell her to come to the next club. This week she finally came. She was thirty minutes late, but that’s okay. I was so happy to see her. Since she was late and the students had already started the activity, I sat down with her and worked one-on-one with her. Each time I praised her work she had the biggest smile on her face. I’m hoping that will be motivation enough to come next week. None of the girls are ever early for English club, only the boys. The girls either come on time or they are late. I suppose it is because they have to do most of the house work.

As I wrote in my last post, during AVC some of us female PCVs got together during one of the sessions to discuss the daily harassment we have to face. The volunteer leading the session put together some facts about women in Ethiopia to prove that there is a reason why the level of harassment in this country is much higher than what other PC countries report. Here are some gender facts I thought would be important to share with people back home so they have a better idea of the gender inequalities in this country. The government has signed pretty much every policy/law out there to end gender inequality however implementing these policies on the ground is a much more difficult task.

These facts come from the World Economic Forum 2013, DHS 2005, Oxfam Ethiopia Country Profile 2013, and UNICEF 2012.

·         Ethiopia ranked 118^th out of 136 countries on the 2013 Global Gender Gap Index.

·         Only 18% of Ethiopian women are literate, compared to 42% of men.

·         In Ethiopia, 71% of women have suffered from physical and/or sexual violence in their lifetime.

·         81% of women agree that wife beating is acceptable for at least one reason.

·         17% of Ethiopian women report that their first instance of sexual intercourse was forced.

·         Only 14% of women are employed outside their family.

·         Women hold only 18.7% of land.

·         The 2011 EDHS found that 12% of women aged 15 – 19 are pregnant or mothers.

·         Fertility rate is 4.8.

·         The maternal mortality rate is 470 (out of 100,000 births).

·         Only 24% of students enrolled in university are female.

·         Ethiopia currently ranks 174^th out of 187 countries on the Human Development Index. Average incomes are less than half the average for sub-Saharan Africa.

·         8% of women were abducted and forced into marriage.

·         Ethiopia is ranked 76 out of 79 countries on IFPRI’s Global Hunger Index.

·         Only 3.2% of the Ethiopian population is over the age of 65.

·         Female Genital Mutilation (FGM) prevalence by Region

¨      Amhara – 68%

¨      Oromyia – 87%

¨      Tigray – 29%

¨      SNNPR – 71%

  

This year, PC Ethiopia has added a fourth goal to our program which involves promoting gender equality. Some of the programs volunteers have started include working with gender clubs at their schools, having female conversation hours, programs involving HIV/AIDS awareness, and working with teachers and administrators to promote student-friendly schools. 

All-Volunteer Conference (AVC)

I did some traveling last week. I had to be in Addis Ababa for the All-Volunteer Conference but a couple days before that I met up with some friends in Hawassa (the capital city of SNNPR). It was a much needed break. All of us that live in the South absolutely love Hawassa. There’s a beautiful lake (you can’t swim in it or you’ll get shisto), some great restaurants, gelato, and it’s just a great place to relax. I hadn’t left Butajira in eight weeks, since G9’s IST (In-Service Training). I left my house early in the morning, around 6:30am so I could catch the direct bus to Hawassa. Missing it would mean having to take three buses and I wasn’t about to go through that. Since it had been eight weeks since I had last traveled I was pretty nervous about getting on a public bus. My stomach started hurting the night before I had to leave. As soon as I arrived at the bus station, men came up to me asking me where I was going wanting to lead me to the right bus. When I gave them my destination, they said the bus was on its way so I would have to wait. They had me sit next to the bus station manager. As in most situations in Ethiopia, I was the center of attention. The manager wanted to talk to me and ask me a gazillion questions. Every guy that came up to the manager’s desk had to look at me and ask about me. Each time I said something in Amharic they started laughing. I guess seeing a foreigner make an attempt at their language is amusing. When the manager asked me why I was going to Hawassa, I told him I was meeting my friend and he immediately asked me if Theresa was my lover. That made me laugh out loud. I’m still not used to how when you say “friend” people assume you mean a boyfriend/girlfriend. After an hour of waiting outside (the manager’s desk isn’t in an office but off to the side of the bus station on a porch) the Hawassa bus finally showed up. Being as I was the foreigner, one of the guys in the bus station forced everybody back who was trying to get on and made sure I had a seat (the bus was already almost full since it had filled up in another town and was just stopping through Butajira to pick up a few more). From that point on the trip was really easy except for the fact that I had no space in between my seat and the one in front of me and so was forced to put my incredibly heavy hiking backpack on my knees. I wasn’t able to move at all for three hours, but I guess that’s partially my fault for packing so much stuff.

            Hawassa was amazing and after a couple days of enjoying Hawassa, walking around, eating a lot, and drinking beer we all headed to Addis for the conference. AVC was a two day event where all Peace Corps Volunteers in Ethiopia (mostly G7, G8, G9) got together. I wasn’t sure what to expect with so many of us together. I’m alone most of the time so the thought of suddenly being surrounded by two hundred volunteers (PC Ethiopia is the second largest PC country) was both exciting and overwhelming.

            We arrived on Thursday afternoon and had dinner with the ambassador that evening. After we finished eating she did an interview with one of the volunteers. That was a great experience. The following day started early with sessions. We divided up into our various sectors, education, health, and environment. It was great getting to hear about some of the things G7 (they are all education volunteers) had done and share our experiences thus far. It was also nice to see that we are all facing similar challenges and it’s more than likely that the problems I’m facing in my school and community, another volunteer is going through something very similar. The rest of the sessions throughout the conference were on different projects we could do in our communities. Several sessions were offered and we got to choose the ones we wanted to attend. Hearing about the various projects that volunteers have been working on and how we could start them left me feeling motivated to go back to site and get back to work.

            I also attended a session on women in PC Ethiopia. Females discussed their experiences with sexual harassment and assault and how it has affected them. This was probably one of the most helpful sessions I attended. We talked about how the daily harassment has changed how we act when we are walking around town and how we communicate with males. For many it has made them more angry, alert, and anxious. For myself, I have to mentally prepare myself for all the attention I’m going to get when I walk out of my house and go into town. Most of us agreed that we have our “bitch face” on when we walk out the door. For many of us, that’s the best we deal with it. It’s a way for us to cope with harassment. It was really helpful to hear that the way I’m reacting to the attention isn’t crazy. I’m not wrong for reacting like this and many of the female PCVs are feeling the same way. Attending that session made everything that I’ve been feeling from the verbal and sexual harassment validating. One volunteer mentioned that she hated the fact that this sort of harassment was enough to make PCVs quit PC and go home. It gets to a point where it becomes too much to handle. That’s why it’s crucial to find healthy ways to cope with it.

            Besides the serious stuff, there were also a lot of fun things we got to do and see. On Friday night there was a talent show and Saturday night was karaoke. Those were great. During lunch on Saturday there was a fair where local vendors came to sell various hand-made items. We were also given time to start thinking about doing summer camps for students with the volunteers living in our region. I’ll talk more about that in a future post. At night after sessions were over we were free to go wherever our stomachs called. I got to eat at a Chinese restaurant, a Mexican restaurant, and on my last night I got a fresh salad and a delicious cupcake. After dinner we went to different clubs and bars. It was so much fun to meet new volunteers and for all of us to be together just having a good time.

            Finally, as my post started with a bus ride, it will end with a bus ride. If I was nervous about the bus station in Butajira, I was super stressed about catching one in Addis. Us volunteers may love going to Addis because of the great restaurants, beer we can drink without people gossiping about us throughout town, hot showers, and going out at night with our friends, but getting around Addis is a pain. You have to catch a “line taxi” to get anywhere. These are like big vans that are full of people and really uncomfortable. The guy who collects the money will stick the upper half of his body out the window and yell the various locations that the bus is heading in. To get a bus home, I first had to get a “line taxi” from my hotel to Mexico. At the present moment Mexico is the biggest pain because either a railroad, or a subway, or a tramway is being built (I honestly still don’t know) but anyways it’s a big mess. There is construction everywhere, huge piles of rubble, hundreds of people going in various directions, people selling random stuff, homeless people begging for money and on top of that dirty water all over the roads that’s coming from who know where. Once in Mexico it took me a little bit to find a line taxi going to the Mercato bus station. I had to ask several people where it was because the first three people I asked completely ignored me. Finally a nice man had me follow him and asked around where it was and lead me to it. I’m so thankful when I run into those people. Now about Mercato. No one likes Mercato. In fact, PC tells us we are not allowed to go to Mercato, except to the bus station for those of us who live on that route, if that tells you anything about the area. After about 15 minutes the line taxi dropped me off in the middle of chaos and told me to walk the rest of the way to the station. I was in the middle of a bunch of small shops. There were people everywhere, the area was gross, random people were shouting out to me, but luckily I didn’t have to walk far and I was pointed in the right direction. Once in the bus station, a swarm of guys came up to me yelling, “Where are you go? Where are you go?” I told them Butajira and a man grabbed my hand and lead me to the bus. I tried to loosen my hand from his grip him but when I noticed he wouldn’t let go I didn’t care as long as he didn’t try anything crazy. I just wanted to get on the bus. Funny how you start to adapt to the way of life here. If some guy in a bus station had physically grabbed me and wouldn’t let go in my first couple months in Ethiopia I would have been so scared. Now it’s normal to me. Of course the bus was full when I got there and people were screaming and shouting. Moments like that I’m glad I don’t understand Amharic. There’s a cushion in between the driver and the passenger seat so I had to sit there. There was a man already on the cushion so I sat behind him so we were back to back and I was facing all the passengers. Not a comfortable ride but I finally made it home.

All in all, public transportation is no fun, but AVC was amazing and well worth the travel. I hope it becomes an annual event and we can do it again next year.

Books for Butajira - updated wish list

    Where the Sidewalk Ends, Shel Silverstein

   Corduroy, Don Freeman

   The Phantom Tollbooth, Norton Juster

  Good Night, Gorilla, Peggy Rathmann

   Winnie the Pooh, A. A. Milne

   The Adventures of Captain Underpants, Dav Pilkey

   Flat Stanley, Jeff Brown

   The Story of Babar, Jean De Brunhoff

  The Jolly Postman or Other People’s Letters, Janet and Allan Ahlberg

   Gorilla, Anthony Browne

   Would You Rather?, John Burningham

   I Will Not Ever Never Eat a Tomato, Lauren Child

   Where’s Spot?, Eric Hill

       The Tiger Who Came to Tea, Judith Kerr

       The Cat in the Hat, Dr. Seuss

       Amelia Bedelia, Peggy Parish

       Alexander and the Terrible, Horrible, No Good, Very Bad Day, Judith Voirst

       The Arrival, Shaun Tan

       Because of Winn-Dixie, Kate DiCamillo

       The Borrowers, Mary Norton

       Caps for Sale, Esphyr Slobodkina

       Charlotte’s Web, E.B. White

                  Chicka Chicka Boom Boom, Bill Martin and John Archambault

                  Curious George, H.A. Rey

                  Don’t Let the Pigeon Drive the Bus!, Mo Willems

                  Frog and Toad Are Friends, Arnold Lobel

                  George and Martha, James Marshall

                  The Giver, Lois Lowry

                  Jumanji, Chris Van Allsburg

                  The Lion and the Mouse, Jerry Pickney

                  Madeline, Ludwig Bemelmans

                  Make Way for Ducklings, Robert McCloskey

                  Mufaro’s Beautiful Daughters: An African Tale, John Steptoe

                  Olivia, Ian Falconer

                  Pippi Longstocking, Astrid Lindgren

                  Ramona the Pest, Beverly Cleary

                  Rickshaw Girl, Mitali Perkins

                  The Story of Ferdinand, Munro Leaf

                  Strega Nona, Tomie dePaola

                  The True Story of the Three Little Pigs, Jon Scieszka

                  Why Mosquitoes Buzz in People’s Ears, Verna Aardema

                  Oh, The Places You’ll Go, Dr. Seuss

                  The Velveteen Rabbit, Margery Williams

                  Sylvester and the Magic Pebble, William Steig

                  Arthur, Marc Tolon Brown

                  My Father’s Dragon, Ruth Stiles Gannett

                  Stuart Little, E.B. White

                  Walk Two Moons, Sharon Creech

                  Mr. Popper’s Penguins, Richard Atwater

Books for Butajira

I absolutely love, love, love to read. Always have and always will. Living here though, I’ve come to realize how much I took all those books I’ve read for granted. In America books are easily accessible.  In Ethiopia though, most students have never seen or opened a fiction book or a children’s story book. The community has three libraries and my school also has one. The library at my school was recently built. There’s plenty of space and all the windows bring in enough light to make it a welcoming environment. The problem is that the only books on the shelves are textbooks and reference books. There is no fiction! Growing up I remember spending hours at the library. The library was part of my childhood and I can’t imagine not having one. Students here come to the library to study, which is good, but they don’t associate the library with reading for fun. There is no reading culture here and developing creativity, imagination, and critical thinking in these students is proving to be a huge challenge. So my goal in the next year and a half is to stock the library with all kinds of books for the students at Mekicho. That’s where you come in.

Friends and family, I need your help!! In a previous post I mentioned a book drive to get books to my school. Well, I have set up the book drive through a great organization called Better World Books. PCVs from previous groups have done this and have been very successful in their communities. All you have to do is buy the books online through the website, give them my address here in Butajira, and they ship it for free… yes for FREE!! All the way here in Ethiopia! And it gets better, the more books you buy, the more discounts you get. Below I have listed my address and a list of all the books I think would be great for my students. Buy them new or used, it’s up to you. I will update the list every week so you can see which books have been bought.

I hope to start developing a reading culture at the school with these books. I’m planning on working with interested teachers and the librarian to hold trainings for students on how to take care of the books if they want to check them out. I want to create reading logs, maybe create a reading club or have these in the library and have competitions for whoever reads the most books. I think it would also be great if we started a program where the older kids go and read to the younger kids. I know that just getting the books at the school will not solve any problems, but our school needs the basic materials to be able to start any of these reading programs. Just know that these books will not be sitting on shelves unused. I plan on working with my school to show them all the potential we have with these books.

If you know anyone that would be interested in helping me out, please let them know about this. Any help would be greatly appreciated. I would be extremely grateful and I know you would make many Ethiopian children happy.

I’ve made a list of some books I think would be great for the school. You can stick to the list or go through the website and find any others you like. There are hundreds to choose from. After you have purchased a book, please let me know which one so I can cross it off the list (facebook or email).

If you have any questions, comments, or ideas you can email me at chevallierhelena@gmail.com

Thank you all so, so much!!! Now, let’s get some books for these kids people!!!!!!

Here’s the website you can buy books at:

betterworldbooks.com

Send them to this address:

Helena Chevallier

PO Box 153

Butajira SNNPR

Ethiopia

If you already have books that you would like to donate, you can also send those to me, you will just have to pay for shipping on those and that gets expensive, but it’s up to you.

Thanks and I’ll update you soon.

Better World Books Wish List!

1)   Where the Wild Things Are, Maurice Sendak

2)   Charlie and the Chocolate Factory, Roald Dahl

3)   The Giving Tree, Shel Silverstein

4)   Where the Sidewalk Ends, Shel Silverstein

5)   Corduroy, Don Freeman

6)   The Phantom Tollbooth, Norton Juster

7)   The Little Engine That Could, Watty Piper

8)   Good Night, Gorilla, Peggy Rathmann

9)   Winnie the Pooh, A. A. Milne

10)                  Are You My Mother?, P.D. Eastman

11)                  The Adventures of Captain Underpants, Dav Pilkey

12)                  A Bear Called Paddington, Michael Bond

13)                  Flat Stanley, Jeff Brown

14)                  The Story of Babar, Jean De Brunhoff

15)                  Each Peach Pear Plum, Janet and Allan Ahlberg

16)                  The Jolly Postman or Other People’s Letters, Janet and Allan Ahlberg

17)                  Gorilla, Anthony Browne

18)                  Would You Rather?, John Burningham

19)                   The Very Hungry Caterpillar, Eric Carle

20)                  I Will Not Ever Never Eat a Tomato, Lauren Child

21)                  Where’s Spot?, Eric Hill

22)                  The Tiger Who Came to Tea, Judith Kerr

23)                  The Cat in the Hat, Dr. Seuss

24)                  Amelia Bedelia, Peggy Parish

25)                  Alexander and the Terrible, Horrible, No Good, Very Bad Day, Judith Voirst

26)                  The Arrival, Shaun Tan

27)                  Because of Winn-Dixie, Kate DiCamillo

28)                  The Borrowers, Mary Norton

29)                  Caps for Sale, Esphyr Slobodkina

30)                  Charlotte’s Web, E.B. White

31)                  Chicka Chicka Boom Boom, Bill Martin and John Archambault

32)                  Curious George, H.A. Rey

33)                  Don’t Let the Pigeon Drive the Bus!, Mo Willems

34)                  Frog and Toad Are Friends, Arnold Lobel

35)                  George and Martha, James Marshall

36)                  The Giver, Lois Lowry

37)                  Jumanji, Chris Van Allsburg

38)                  The Lion and the Mouse, Jerry Pickney

39)                  Madeline, Ludwig Bemelmans

40)                  Make Way for Ducklings, Robert McCloskey

41)                  Mufaro’s Beautiful Daughters: An African Tale, John Steptoe

42)                  Olivia, Ian Falconer

43)                  Pippi Longstocking, Astrid Lindgren

44)                  Ramona the Pest, Beverly Cleary

45)                  Rickshaw Girl, Mitali Perkins

46)                  The Story of Ferdinand, Munro Leaf

47)                  Strega Nona, Tomie dePaola

48)                  The True Story of the Three Little Pigs, Jon Scieszka

49)                  Why Mosquitoes Buzz in People’s Ears, Verna Aardema

50)                  Oh, The Places You’ll Go, Dr. Seuss

51)                  The Velveteen Rabbit, Margery Williams

52)                  Sylvester and the Magic Pebble, William Steig

53)                  The Little Engine That Could, Watty Piper

54)                  Arthur, Marc Tolon Brown

55)                  Clifford, The Big Red Dog, Norman Bridwell

56)                  My Father’s Dragon, Ruth Stiles Gannett

57)                  Stuart Little, E.B. White

58)                  Walk Two Moons, Sharon Creech

59)                  Mr. Popper’s Penguins, Richard Atwater

60)                  Ramona Quimby, Age 8, Beverly Cleary

Teacher Trainings

My main focus as an education volunteer is to hold trainings for the English teachers at the primary schools in Butajira. I am here to support and help the teachers in any way that I can. Having completed my CENA, gone through our group’s IST (In-Service Training for G9) and with the second semester begun, I along with the education office here in Butajira started programming for the teacher trainings. After a brief meeting with the head of the education office, other members of the office and the cluster supervisor, we decided to focus the trainings on active learning methodologies since that it what the Ethiopian English syllabus wants teachers to focus on. We have teacher trainings planned for the next 6 weeks, every Saturday morning from 9am to noon. Teachers are split into 2 cycles. Cycle 1 teachers grades 5 – 8 while cycle 2 teachers grades 1 – 4. Teachers meet every other week depending on which cycle they are. In all, 28 English teachers were invited from the 4 primary schools in the Butajira area.

            Safe to say I’ve been pretty nervous and uneasy about holding these trainings probably ever since I found out this was what my job entailed, so for a few months now. I held my first training yesterday morning. Of the 16 cycle 1 teachers that were expected to come, 13 showed up. I was pleased with that number. I prepared all week, going through all the material volunteers from previous groups had given me, my notes from my own training sessions with Peace Corps, and all the material we had received from Peace Corps. It was a lot. All week I prepared flip charts to present to the teachers and went into town to print out some useful handouts for them. I decided to start with an introduction to communicative teaching methodology and to compare it with other methodologies that are commonly used in Ethiopia. I did my best to make the trainings as active as possible so that teachers would see how they can use active learning in their lessons. I had the teachers start by sharing their own teaching experiences. Teachers don’t seem to do much collaboration and I think it would be to their benefit to share their classroom experiences and practices. We then looked over the teaching methodologies that were previously used in Ethiopia and what method (communicative language teaching or active learning) the new syllabus is expecting teachers to follow. I thought this would be a good idea so teachers could see what method their teaching falls under and what practices they should aim for.  

            After our sai-bunna break (tea/coffee break which also includes a fried pastry called koker that I love) I thought it would be a good idea to discuss doing group work and pair work in the classroom since this is one of the techniques of active learning. Many of the teachers do not know how to incorporate group work into their lessons or if they do, they have trouble making it effective. Having eighty plus students in your classroom however makes it difficult to make group work successful. I split the teachers into groups and had them discuss some of the challenges and advantages that they have when doing group/pair work. Next, I gave them a handout and went over some group work activities that they can do in their own lessons. I challenged them to try one of these techniques in the next 2 weeks, reflect on what they did, and bring their notes and ideas back to the next training.

            To finish the training, I had the teachers answer some feedback questions. I asked them what they liked and didn’t like about the training they received, and what trainings they would be interested in receiving in the future. All the feedback was positive. Teachers thanked me for giving the training and are excited for the next one. They explained that they never receive any material so these trainings are great. They seemed to really appreciate what I was doing and the work I had put into it. They want to continue coming to the trainings which was great to hear. I couldn’t be happier with the results and I’m excited for the next 5 weeks of training.

One last point I’d like to mention. I feel that there is a lot of pressure put on teachers, English teachers in particular since all subjects are taught in English from 5^th grade on. They are being pushed to teach using more communicative methods and make their lessons student-centered instead of teacher-centered, but they have very few resources, their classroom sizes are ridiculously large, and they are not given any material on how to make their lessons communicative. They are told to use active learning, but they have never been taught how to use such methods. I have a lot of work to do in the next year and a half but if anything, this first training showed me that the teachers want my help and are ready to work with me. I’m excited for the work ahead. The future looks good.  

My model classroom

After my last post was pretty negative, I’m hoping this one will make you smile. One of my tasks as an education volunteer is to set up a model classroom. I don’t do any direct teaching or have my own set of students (except for my English club). The space I am given is to be used to show how a classroom can be used as a teaching tool either by decorating it in a certain way or making and putting up examples of teaching aids. It’s important to create a welcoming environment for students to want to learn and study. A typical Ethiopian classroom has a used/cracked chalkboard, dirt floors, mud walls, and is filled with old, overused wooden desks. There are usually 3-4 students to a desk (at least at my school) meant for only 2. Average class size at my school is 80 students. In the lower grades (grades 1 and 2) however, I have seen over 100 students in a class! It’s pretty overwhelming and I don’t know how the teachers do it. Most rooms are very dark and somber looking. As you can imagine this does not create the best learning space for students.

Since I’ve gotten my model classroom I’ve been working on making it a nice space for both the teachers and the students to enjoy. I had the room painted a few weeks after I was given the key. Since then, I’ve gotten some more desks from my school and a chalkboard. (I’ve been very lucky with my placement in this school system. The administrative staff, the teachers, and the education office support me completely. They are always telling me that anything I need to just ask. My counterpart, the cluster supervisor for Butajira primary schools, tells me not to worry every time he sees me. Whatever I need he will get it for me. I know this is not the situation for a lot of volunteers so I’m very thankful for this placement). With the model classroom I’m to show how teachers can make their own teaching aids using few resources. I thought I would post some pictures of what I’ve been working on. It’s not completely finished, but I’m getting there and so far, the school seems to like it. Teachers and students come in when I’m there to look at what I’ve done and read all of my posters. The education office has visited my room and they would like me to show and help teachers do this in the classrooms of the younger grades.

            Some of the projects I’m doing in my classroom include English club and teacher trainings. I’ve got an English club for grades 7 and 8 already going. We meet once a week for an hour, on English Day (Thursday for my school). I’ve included pictures of what we did in our last meeting. We discussed setting goals and made “Life Goals Tree.” We talked about not only the importance of setting goals (represented by the branches of the tree) but also knowing the steps we need to make to make our goals a reality (represented by the roots of the tree). The roots help us get to our goal. When the students were finished I had them tape their trees on the walls.

I’d like to start a club for grades 5 and 6 as well so hopefully in the next couple weeks that will be set up. This week I’ll be going to one of the other primary schools in Butajira to discuss getting a space for a model classroom and setting up some English clubs that I can run with the English teachers. This week, I will also be starting a series of teacher trainings to last 6 weeks for all the English teachers in the primary schools of Butajira (look for a future post on how that goes).  

And finally, thanks to a donation from one of my wonderful friends in America, I have books in my classroom as well!! With my classroom being almost finished I brought the books to school and now slowly, students are coming in to look at them and read them. This makes me so, so happy!! I’ve got a project lined up for a book drive to start collecting some more books for my school so be on the lookout for that in the future.

I have to say, it feels good to finally have some stuff happening. 

Having a rough week

Last week was probably one of my worst weeks here. Nothing seemed to go right and it made me feel like terrible emotionally speaking. Everything seemed to go wrong all at once, I guess that’s how it usually happens. First, things didn’t seem to be moving at my school. Looking back on it I was probably impatient, but I felt like I was getting nothing done. Second, the harassment seemed to be worse than usual. Maybe I was just noticing it more last week or maybe after weeks and weeks of ignoring it you finally just can’t take it anymore. That’s probably more like it. Sometimes the harassment just makes me want to cry. To add to the negativity, I had communication issues with my landlady. The light bulb in my bedroom went out so I went to ask her what kind I needed to buy to replace it and where I could get one. After I bought it, I thought I had bought the wrong one so I went to my landlady’s house again. She speaks no English and I speak almost no Amharic so having had a bad day, plus not being able to communicate and needing my light bulb fixed I got so frustrated and impatient. After understanding one another I felt like shit because I had been impatient with her, so then I felt like an awful person and hated myself. I told myself I was a terrible Peace Corps Volunteer. Again, not great for my already fragile emotional state.

To top off my week, my 7^th and 8^th grade English club was to meet for the first time this semester (we met a couple times last semester). The English teacher who helps me set it up said he told all the students about it. I spent quite a bit of time working on a lesson plan. When the meeting finally came, only five students showed up. I had not prepared myself for this at all. My lesson plan was meant for the entire class. So when I realized that those five were it, I had no idea what to do. I was completely unprepared. We did a short activity that I had planned and then I had them read some books. After club, I walked home and felt like the biggest failure. I don’t know how to describe it. I have never had that feeling before. I was disappointed in myself. I was mad at myself and mad at Ethiopia. I kept asking myself what I was doing here if no one was going to come to my events. And then if I get harassed every time I walk out of my compound people must not want me here. These were the thoughts running through my head. Throughout training Peace Corps tells you to be flexible because many of the things that you plan won’t go how you want them to, but no one told me how this would affect me emotionally. After getting over the fact that only five students came, I hated myself because I felt like I had failed those five students. I felt like I had given up when I realized they were all that were going to come that day. I kept telling myself I should have been prepared for that to happen. I felt like the biggest failure and walking out of that classroom after the hour was over I had no idea how I was going to get back from this.

So of course I called my girl Theresa and told her what had happened and how I was feeling. It’s always nice to have your feelings validated and know that other volunteers are going through the same stuff as you. I still didn’t feel great, but after our conversation I felt better. What I needed to do was go home, watch a stupid movie, eat some chocolate, and worry about Ethiopia after the weekend. And that’s what I did. I had a Skype date with my sister that night and I feel like an awful sister because when she asked me how my day was I flat out told her, “I don’t want to talk about it, seriously.” Because I thought if I told someone back home what happened I would start crying and feel like an even bigger failure. That’s not what you want people back home to know. You don’t want them to know you failed, that what you are doing isn’t working, that you want to quit. Well now that I’m feeling better I feel I have the strength to tell you how it is, at least for this week, who knows what Peace Corps will have for me next week.   

So what did I learn from all this? Failure sucks and having “Bridesmaids” on your hard drive is a life saver. But no matter how painful failing is, I’m seeing how necessary it is in understanding how to do better and how to improve. And as Theresa told me, my English club wasn’t a failure. It didn’t go as planned but that doesn’t mean it failed. And now I know how to go about it in the future. For my next English club, I went into it with a completely different attitude. Expect nothing and everything, be flexible, and don’t give up. If only five students show up then you teach those five students and they get all your attention. As for the harassment, there are people who don’t want me here. I just need to face the facts. Probably a lot of people don’t want a white girl here. But I know some people who are happy to have me, who want my support and help, so I need to focus on those people and talk and hang out with them. I shouldn’t worry about the rest.

Last week I felt like I fell, deep, very deep. When I fell, I wanted to go home and give up. I got back up though, didn’t let last week get to me and put it behind me. Instead, I had a pretty amazing week this week. Probably the best week I’ve had in country so far. Oh Peace Corps, what are you doing to me?

And with that I leave you with this quote:

“Success is not final, failure is not fatal: it is the courage to continue that counts”

 – Winston Churchill