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Tuesday, November 5, 2013

Ethiopian ceremony for a new baby

            This past weekend I got to see some PCVs (Peace Corps Volunteers). It was so great getting to see some of the people I had gotten close to during training. But as soon as I stepped back into my house I felt a rush of sadness. I was reminded that I was alone. It is not as simple as it may seem to spend a couple days with several people and then suddenly go back home to emptiness. Finding a balance between the two is part of this whole experience. Because there were moments over the weekend where I felt overwhelmed being around all the PCVs. I’ve been by myself for 7 weeks now so to go from one extreme to the other is challenging. If I stay alone too long I feel sad, but if I hang around other PCVs for too long and am away from my home I don’t like that either.
            As soon as I arrived home I went to bed and slept for a couple hours because emotionally, I wasn’t feeling great. I then received a text message from my neighbor inviting me to a bunna (coffee) ceremony that afternoon. I wasn’t really feeling up to it, but I need to make friends so even though I wasn’t in a state of mind to go, I felt it was the right thing to do. I’m so glad I ended up going. My neighbors are a Dutch couple that work for VSO at the hospital here in Butajira. They have their 2 little children with them and they had invited some other neighbors for the ceremony. So I got to meet some more people that live on my street. As I was socializing with the group, that sadness that I had felt after leaving my friends went away and I forgot that I had been upset in the first place.
            The Ethiopian woman that was making the coffee for us told me that a woman on the street behind ours had just had a baby. It is custom in Ethiopia that on the fifth day of a baby’s birth, a ceremony for the woman be held. People from the neighborhood come over to the mother’s house to visit her and her baby. Bunna is offered to all the guests and a local food called gunfo. Ethiopians describe gunfo to me as porridge. It tastes like raw dough and in the middle there is butter that you dip the dough into. Women eat a lot of this after giving birth because it helps them regain their strength. I really don’t like it but it is considered rude not to eat when food is offered to you, so I took little tiny bites, hoping it was enough. We ate in the mother’s bedroom as she was laying and resting on her bed with the baby. There were chairs set aside in her bedroom for visitors. Every time I put my spoon back down, the mother would say, “Helena, please, eat more.” So I had to take more little bites. I was there for probably about 45 minutes and in that span of time people kept coming into the bedroom to greet the mother and wish her well. Afterwards they would all gather in the living room to eat, drink, and talk. It felt great to be a part of such an important ceremony and something that is truly Ethiopian. I enjoyed seeing people from the community that I knew and talking to them. It felt like I was part of their celebration and more importantly that I was becoming part of this community.

            Whenever I have bad days or I feel sad I find that my mood changes completely when I go visit people. As time goes on I’m realizing that even though I may be far away from my friends and family back home and my other PCV friends, I’m making friends here, in my town. And even though my Amharic is not good and I am often limited in what I can say, it doesn’t stop me from finding happiness with these people.

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