Close of Service (COS) Conference

I just arrived back to site after about three weeks away. A good chunk of that time was spent at my group's (G9) COS conference and then in Addis Ababa to complete medical clearance. COS conference is probably the one conference that volunteers dream about since the day they arrive in country. It always seemed so far away, like I would never be able to reach it. But I did. It came and went. Arriving at this conference means you completed your 2 years. Of course you have a couple months left afterwards to finish your service, but once you've arrived at this point you know you did it. You feel like you've accomplished something. I think it was a pretty proud moment for all of us in G9.

We all arrived in Addis on Sunday May 31st, and began the conference the following day. I was able to meet up with people I hadn't seen since last September. We don't often get to see one another and when I do see another volunteer it's usually someone from my region. After a half day of sessions the bus arrived and took us down to Lake Langano, about 4 hours south of Addis. Peace Corps really did well for this conference. They put us up in a beautiful resort. We were 4 PCVs to a bungalow. There was a pool and a wide outdoor area for us to make a campfire at night. The lake was gorgeous. We had some wonderful weather and of course the food was delicious. Also I'm pretty sure we were the only ones staying at the resort seeing as how Ethiopia is getting into low season so we pretty much had the place to ourselves.

The next 2 days were spent basically celebrating us. Everyone was in a great mood.  It was wonderful and beautiful and there were tears. To put in simple terms, it was bittersweet. The sweetness comes because we're happy to have made it 2 years. 2 years that were not easy. We've been pushed in more ways than one. We've had to deal with things we would never encounter back home and we made it out. The end is in site for all of us now and we're ready to be home. Though at the same time it's bitter. This life that we've created for ourselves in our individual sites is over. Being a part of our Peace Corps community is over. And no matter how much we may complain about it sometimes it's going to be hard to leave that environment. This has become our home. So yeah, there were quite a few tears. We've also been able to see the changes in one another over the past 2 years. We're not really different than we were. We're still us, but I think a lot of us have grown and matured. If anything we're all stronger, braver, and more confident. Since our conference I'd been trying to figure out how to explain the change I feel in myself because I don't think that change will be so apparent when I go home.  I mean, I'm still me. But as another PCV put it, we've gotten rid of a lot of bullshit in our lives. Any crap we were carrying around we've learned to let go. The drama, the bullshit, the pettiness, it's all a waste of energy. I think we've realized what's most important in life.  I've learned to follow my instincts and to trust myself. I want to surround myself with people who make me happy, who make me feel good, who help me grow and learn. I've learned to focus on the positive relationships in my life and get rid of the negative ones. And PC has allowed us to realize the kind of people we want to be. Where we want to go. Even if we may not know exactly what that is or what that future looks like, we have a better idea of the kind of people we want to become.

By best friends in Ethiopia, Delia and Jaynice.

Moving on from that, the conference wasn't just one big party as it might seem. We also had sessions, but these felt less intense than what we've been used to since arriving in Ethiopia. We went over some of our accomplishments in the last 2 years and then discussed our options and the opportunities we have after our service is over. I was kind of nervous about getting to COS conference and hearing that everyone knew what they would be doing when they stepped foot in the States. Contrary to what I had imagined, the majority of us are in the same boat. Most of us don't know what we're doing next and are going home to live with our parents. Even though it is nice to have a plan, I think Peace Corps has taught me not to worry so much about what's next and to focus on the present. I should focus on the things I can control and then take the opportunities as they come along. Because when you have it all figured out and planned for the next several years you might miss out on some great opportunities. One of my favorite professors at UT once gave me similar advice. I've followed it and it's worked thus far. I'm trying to remember that and keep an open mind about what's next for me. It's a bit scary not knowing what's on the other side. All I know right now is I want to go home and spend time with my family and friends. I don't want to jump into a job right away. And if I'm being honest I don't think I'm ready for that. I'm going to need some time to reintegrate and readjust to life in America and put meaning into my time into Ethiopia.